


Can't Hear You Calling Me

by rebelbellarke



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Gen, Implied/Referenced Torture, Speculation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-25
Updated: 2015-01-25
Packaged: 2018-03-08 23:17:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3227192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rebelbellarke/pseuds/rebelbellarke
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>His voice dropped off a little at the end, and something about it sounded so final that for one long moment all Clarke wanted to do was tear the walkie talkie from Octavia’s hand, call it off, tell Bellamy that she took it all back, and she needed him to be safe and back with them. And then the moment was gone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Can't Hear You Calling Me

**Author's Note:**

> Partly inspired by [this](http://lthranduilion.tumblr.com/post/108906195964/but-but-what-if-they-torture-bellamy-in-mt) text post, and partly by my own need for a really angsty Bellarke fic. This fic is speculation for the next few episodes.
> 
> Betaed by [lesbianlexa](http://lesbianlexa.tumblr.com).

He was gone by the time she woke up the next morning. The sun was high in the sky, and Clarke’s little group of attendants were scattered and hard at work. Her mother and Marcus Kane were huddled together off to the side of the camp, but she paid them no attention. She was looking for one face in the crowd.

She wasn’t too easy to pick out, with her braids blending her into the crowd, but Clarke found her easily. For all the grounder that crept inside of her since she landed, there was still something binding Octavia to the Sky People. Not something. _Someone._ So, when she finally found the younger girl, Clarke wasn’t surprised to see her crouched over the radio with Raven, quietly listening to Jasper’s still repeating message. There was a walkie talkie clutched in her hand, and the moment Clarke saw the whiteness of her knuckles she knew he was already gone.

It was what she wanted, honestly, as she spoke to him the night before. Pushing down all the love and fear that exploded inside of her was hard enough as she stared Bellamy in the face and ordered him to go. It would have been just that much harder to have to wake up and say goodbye all over again. So, _good luck_ would just have to suffice.

The two girls were huddled together whispering, and didn’t seem to hear the footsteps behind them as Clarke approached. She’d barely spoken a word to either of them since the horrible morning that she had thrust a knife into Finn’s heart and torn them all apart. Together they worked seamlessly, and for a moment she wasn’t even sure if she should bother with interrupting. There was no way Bellamy had made it to Mount Weather yet, and no way their people were free. So she didn’t care. She _couldn’t_ care.

Lexa was likely in a hut, already planning their attack. She’d be better off there, doing what leaders did and distancing herself from anyone she knew and loved in the village. Love, after all, was weakness. She couldn’t afford to be weak any more. 

She already began to walk away when Octavia’s voice pierced through the low bustle of Tondc’s normal routine. 

“They left already.” The sentence was light and short, but there was a hardness in her voice that Clarke hadn’t heard before. “A few hours ago,” she finished.

She turned back to her friends, and met Octavia’s piercing blue gaze. Raven was still leaned over the radio, studiously ignoring them both, but Octavia fixated on Clarke. The stare was filled with so many emotions, Clarke almost cringed under the weight of it. There was so much packed into Octavia’s eyes, anger and sadness and blame and pity and love all at once, that she wanted to run away and hide from it. Instead she just nodded and asked, “They?”

“Lincoln went too, to guide him in.”

There was nothing Clarke could say to that, to apologize for sending the two people Octavia loved most in the world to their deaths in a cold, lifeless mountain, so she just nodded once more. Then she ordered the two girls to keep her updated before she retreated back into the almost clinical sterility of battle planning with the Commander.

They planned long into the night, keeping the discussion formal and geared toward strategy. It almost took her mind away from Bellamy, marching toward the Mountain Men with only a former reaper as back up, the thoughts ebbing away the longer she planned and the further he got from the village. By the time she turned into her tent and slipped into blissful oblivion, there was nothing on her mind at all.

...

Any semblance of a peaceful mind was shattered early the next morning by Raven pulling the flap of Clarke’s tent open and shaking her awake. She jolted out of bed, suddenly all too aware of everything, and found herself wildly staring into a pair of hard brown eyes.

“Bellamy just radioed. They’re almost there. You should come talk to him.” It was the longest, most civil thing Raven had said to her in almost three days, and Clarke found herself unable to refuse. 

The sun was barely up over the trees when Clarke stepped out into the red light of the sunrise and made her way back to where Raven and Octavia sat. While the older girl fiddled with buttons on the radio, now just buzzing static and an occasional cut off word, Octavia held the walkie talkie up and laughed into it. She wasn’t clinging to it like it was a lifeline anymore, though Clarke still felt a tension hanging around the younger girl.

The smoking embers of the long forgotten fire did little to warm up the chill that surrounded them, and a shiver rolled through Clarke as she sat down, pulling her jacket tighter around her to ward off the cold. Octavia looked up at her, offering as small tight smile as she continued to listen to her brother and Lincoln talk.

Briefly, she held out the walkie talkie to Clarke. “Do you have anything you want to say to him?”

The question hung in the air for a moment before she shook her head. There was nothing else to be said. Bellamy surely had a plan, and there was nothing to be done until he was securely inside the mountain. 

The look Octavia sent her way as she replied to her brother had an entirely different chill seeping into Clarke’s bones. She looked toward the ashes of the fire rather than at either of her companions, and just listened to the asinine chatter and back and forth banter between the Blakes for a while. Slowly the sun began to rise higher up and talk turned from distraction to business.

“We’re going in after dark.” Distantly, Clarke knew whose voice she heard over the walkies, but it was so crackly and distorted she could almost bring herself to pretend it was a stranger. “Lincoln is going to pretend he’s a reaper and I’m someone he caught then we’re going to take out whoever they send down and infiltrate using those suits Clarke said they all wore.”

The sound of her name did little to Clarke, who still stared away rather than make eye contact with the two girls, but something in the way he said it sounded so radically different from how it usually did coming from Bellamy’s mouth. A few days ago it would have hurt, and Clarke would have told herself she was being silly and it was just the device distorting him. But now she ignored it entirely, concentrating on the plan.

“I’m going to find somewhere to hide, and then radio you guys. Don’t worry if you don’t hear from me for a little while, O. I’ll get in contact as soon as I can. I love you.” His voice dropped off a little at the end, and something about it sounded so final that for one long moment all Clarke wanted to do was tear the walkie talkie from Octavia’s hand, call it off, tell Bellamy that she took it all back, and she needed him to be safe and back with them. 

“I love you too.” Octavia softly replied.

And then the moment was gone. This was what needed to be done, and Clarke knew that her weakness couldn’t hold them back. The voice on the walkie talkie changed, and now Lincoln was on saying his goodbyes. 

She rose once more and circled around to where Raven was working on the radio. Swallowing hard, Clarke sat down by her friend. They were silent at first, but Raven wasn’t one for a companionable silence with someone whose entire relationship with her had so recently been thrown for a loop. “What do you want, Clarke?”

Clarke sighed, then spoke firmly. “I know you’re mad at me, but we need to work together if we want this to work. Can you do that?”

She braced herself for a punch, or a slap, or even a verbal assault, but all she got was brief eye contact and a curt nod before Raven returned her attention to the radio. 

Surprised, Clarke stared at the mechanic as she worked, then ventured to ask a further question. “What are you working on?”

This time Raven didn’t pull herself away from the radio, continuing to twist knobs and cross wires as she replied. “I’m boosting the signal. I thought if we could hear their communications as well from here as we could from the base of the mountain it would be useful. I almost had it finished when…” She trailed off, but Clarke didn’t need her to finish the sentence. Bringing up Finn now would just hurt them all.

“Have you been working on this all night?” The answer to the question was obvious to Clarke, as she took in the fatigue that shrouded Raven’s every move.

“I had a nap, I think. Octavia was up all night too, listening for Bellamy and Lincoln on the radio.” The older girl’s voice was absent, and Clarke could tell she was already being totally absorbed back into her work.

There was only one thing she could do. “Tonight, after I’m done meeting with Lexa, I’m going to watch the radio and you are going to bed.” It came out as an order, and Clarke left no room for either girl to argue with her. “Both of you,” she glanced over her shoulder at Octavia who had finished up with the walkie talkie and now listened from a distance to her companions.

They nodded, though neither looked impressed with the turn of events, and Clarke pushed herself to her feet. “Keep me updated,” she looked between them, “I have to go.”

...

She left them in their radio silence, and made her way once more to Lexa’s hut. The planning went smoothly this time, everything fell into place, until they were interrupted by a huge whooping shout of triumph that came from outside.

Clarke recognized the voice easily, and was out by the fire in under a minute. She stared in wonder at the huge smile splitting Raven’s face. It was the first true smile she had seen on her friend since the grounders had approached Camp Jaha days ago, and something deep inside of Clarke lifted in happiness when she saw that joy.

Raven looked up at Clarke, smile intact, and pointed at the radio. She reached out and turned a button and suddenly the air was filled with voices, transmitting messages. Mount Weather voices. “I did it, Clarke!”

Octavia, who sat off to the side clutching her walkie talkie again, made her way over, a small smile on her face too. Despite her best efforts, even Clarke found herself unable to stop a smile from creeping onto her face.

As Raven celebrated, Clarke took a second to step away and collect herself, shoving the emotions back. This was a good development. The second Bellamy got in contact with them, someone would be able to update him with inside information. Maybe he would make it out after all.

The sun was long gone, and stars began to light up the sky, so Clarke turned to Lexa, who waited behind her. “Are we done for the night?”

The commander nodded and quickly departed for her hut. Taking a steadying breath, Clarke approached Raven and Octavia. “You should go to bed. Get some sleep and you can come right back in the morning. I’ll wake you if anything happens.”

As Clarke expected, they both protested, but ultimately left her alone with the radio and the walkie talkie, with just her thoughts and the sounds of the sleeping village to keep Clarke company. It was almost relaxing, just sitting there and listening to the mundane reports over the radio. Surely Bellamy and Lincoln were inside the mountain by now, if they were waiting for the cover of darkness to begin, and the more time passed with the reports out of Mount Weather staying basic and friendly, the better their chances of safety were.

Minutes passed, and with each new word passing back and forth on the radio she could feel a little bit of weight lifting from her shoulders. For all the effort she had put in to shut off her emotions and not care, Clarke couldn’t help but let herself be happy that Bellamy was okay, and this wasn’t a complete waste of life. 

Then it all changed.

“Sir, we’ve got a breach.” The voice buzzed over the radio, and she reacted without thinking, reaching out to turn up the volume.

“A containment breach? I don’t hear an alarm.” The reply came after a moment’s pause, and Clarke found herself letting out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. Of course it was a containment breach. The mountain couldn’t afford to let any radiation in. It wasn’t Bellamy.

“No, intruders. Two of them, I’ve got them on one of my cameras.” A strangled noise made it’s way out of her mouth. It was Bellamy. “We need to send a crew down. Do we have any suited up?” 

“Dispatching now. Stand by.”

The radio went silent, and Clarke found herself staring at it in horror, a scream building up inside of her. “No. No!” Blindly she grabbed for the walkie talkie and brought it up to her mouth. “They’re coming, Bellamy, run!”

“Clarke?” Lincoln’s voice crackled loudly through the speaker, and Clarke’s heart almost stopped beating from fear.

“Run! The Mountain men know you’re there!” She repeated loudly into the mouthpiece of the walkie talkie and let go of call button. Then she waited. Nothing came back, and she was greeted once more with silence and a deep fear that she had gambled Bellamy’s life and lost badly.

She gave them ten minutes to reply, and was still staring in horror at the radio in front of her when Octavia walked up to her and sat down, fear written all over her face.

“What’s happening?” The younger girls voice was a whisper, and as Clarke looked up, she could see starlight in the unshed tears in her friend’s eyes.

Clarke pushed down the sob she was afraid was going to come out if she opening her mouth, and began to talk. “Mount Weather knows they’re there. I tried to warn them, but I… I don’t know if they got away or not.”

Octavia sniffled and wiped at her eyes, then sat down and held out her hand for the walkie talkie. Clarke’s fingers curled around it, but she reluctantly held it out. Octavia’s gaze dropped to the walkie talkie, and after seeming to contemplate it she dropped her hand. Clarke pulled the walkie talkie back to her chest and the two girls sat together and waited.

...

She didn’t know how much time had passed as they sat there drowning in the silence, only that by the time there was another communication on the radio Raven had joined their vigil and the sun had once again slipped above the trees, casting the three girls in an eerie red glow. It started with a burst of static followed by a voice that made all three jump into some semblance of action.

“Has the breach has been taken care of?” 

They waited with baited breath for the reply. “We got one of them, and locked him up with the others. The second got away. Permission to send a team, sir? It may be too late now, we think he’s been gone a while.”

“Don’t let the other one get away.”

One of them. One captured, one escaped. But who had gotten away? Selfishly, Clarke hoped Bellamy had been the one to run. Lincoln had survived Mount Weather before, and surely he could again, but she didn’t want to take a chance on Bellamy. There wasn’t much any of them could do from so far away, except stare at the radio.

Not looking at either of the other girls, Clarke spoke firmly into the walkie talkie. “Bellamy? Lincoln?” She paused, then repeated, “Bellamy?”

From somewhere to her left, Clarke heard the sound of repressed crying, and whispered words of comfort. She yearned to move closer and listen, to comfort and be comforted as well, but the leader inside of her kept her distance. Or was it the monster inside who was keeping her away? Clarke wasn’t sure, so she stood up and put some distance between them all.

She repeated his name into the walkie talkie every few minutes, craving his reply. But the longer she went without a reply, the more certain she became that he had been the one caught and locked away.

Neither Raven nor Octavia seemed to have followed her, so Clarke stopped a short distance from the gates of Tondc and stared down at the walkie talkie in her hand. Still nothing.

The sun was slightly higher in the sky and Clarke had barely moved when she finally heard a familiar distant voice over the walkie talkie. Bellamy. She almost fumbled it in shock, and was about to speak when another, unfamiliar man’s voice cut in. “Consider this a warning, whoever may be listening.”

There was something wholly chilling about the tone of the voice, and as soon as they had stopped speaking a static lingered behind. Whoever had the little machine had jammed the call button, ensuring that Clarke could hear all of whatever was about to happen.

It began with a simple question, from the stranger. “Tell me about the outsiders.”

Distantly, she heard Bellamy laugh bitterly. “I’m not telling you anything.”

“Did you make an alliance with them?”

“No.” Bellamy immediately spat back. “I already said I’m not telling you anything.”

The stranger let out a cruel chuckle, and Clarke’s heart sank into the ground. “We have ways to make you talk, Mr. Blake.”

“No,” she whispered, suddenly terrified for him. 

“Try me.” Bellamy’s voice was all heat and venom, opposing the chilled voice of the man who was interrogating him.

Then a bang rang out, the distinct sound of skin hitting skin, and another, of skin hitting something so much harsher, and Bellamy let out a low growl.

Alone and so far away from him, Clarke could feel tears welling up in her eyes, threatening to spill over. She had sent him to this, to whatever pain and anguish he was about to feel. 

But Bellamy was strong, and the next round of questions didn’t break him. Nor the threats to himself. Nor the brutal sounds coming through the radio that left Clarke with tears rolling down her cheeks and fear gripping at her heart like a claw.

“You know, it doesn’t have to be you that we hurt. We just have to hurt someone you love. So take your pick, who is it going to be?” Bellamy didn’t answer, but Clarke could heard his heavy, strained breathing in the background. The voice continued, “Jasper? Monty? Clarke?”

“Clarke isn’t here.”

The stranger laughed then, without an ounce of joy or happiness in it. “We’ve gotten her here once, we can get her back.”

“She’d never let you take her. She’s too strong for that.”

A growl and a bang came across the radio, and Clarke finally broke, letting out a sob. It continued on like that, with Bellamy unyielding against his captor and Clarke sobbing over the walkie talkie, as she listened to the person she trusted most on the planet get beaten and broken.

“You could have made this easy for all of us, Bellamy.” 

The words were ominous, and a sense of foreboding settled over Clarke as an eerie silence settled over both her and the radio. Tears still streaked her face, and the only sound she could hear for a moment was her own unsteady breath. And then the air swelled with the sound of a scream. It was Bellamy’s scream, and it was achingly familiar to her. It went on too long, until Clarke felt as though she was either going to start screaming with him or lose her mind.

They started and stopped, the screams, and with each one Clarke cried harder, wondering if it was the last thing she was ever going to hear from him, and wondering if an emotionless good luck was the last thing he would ever hear from her.

“That’s it,” the stranger hissed, “I’m going to break you, even if I have to kill you to do it.”

Then there was a bang, and the walkie talkie let out a sickening crunch from it’s speakers and went dead, the connection to the other side severed. Clarke’s entire body had gone numb, and the walkie talkie dropped to the ground as her fingers went totally slack.

Behind her, Octavia spoke up. When she had crept up, Clarke wasn’t sure, but there was no doubt she had heard everything. “Was it worth the risk, Clarke?”

Her friend’s voice was icy and harsh, and the words hit Clarke in the gut like a visceral punch.

_Yes, it was worth it,_ her head said.

_No, it wasn’t,_ her heart screamed. _I can’t lose you too._

Body still numb, Clarke wiped her eyes and walked past Octavia, back into Tondc, not saying a word. The time for talking was over. Now, it was time for action.

**Author's Note:**

> So... any thoughts? Feedback? Let me know what you think?
> 
> If you want more of me, you can find me on tumblr at [ashxrmillstone](http://ashxrmillstone.tumblr.com), or on twitter at rebelbellarke.


End file.
